Frame Control

I had a meeting in another building yesterday morning. I was always to taught as a kid to be on time for everything because it shows you respect the other people you are meeting.

The contractor was late and not just 5 minutes late but a whole 30 minutes late for an hour and a half meeting. I could tell that people around the room were annoyed.

When they did show up they apologized meaning little to the group. But what amazed me is that when the meeting officially started the contractor essentially bullied us, the owner, making his voice louder than the others, questioning our procedures, making comments with subliminal messages to his fellow team that was clearly aimed at us.

I was surprised that even though we vastly out-numbered them he still was able to control the room so easily. He even answered the phone during the meeting which was very distracting. Why did my team allow this to happen? I felt like I should’ve said something but didn’t because of my lack of knowledge about the procedures and project as a whole. Did the other members feel the same way about this?

What I learned from this meeting is that I should re-read the Pitch Anything by Oren Klaff which talks about controlling the room and situations. I also learned that in order to be able to make the comments this contractor did and control the room I need to have a good understanding of the items we are discussing.